i think those new droids are gonna work out just fine

Recipe for a successful* Sunday:
1) Take shoes ordered online back to DSW.

• 1a) Spend a long time finding other shoes instead of just returning ill-fitting pairs ordered online.

2) Feel pleased how "little" final bill is, wilfully ignoring you already paid a certain amount and are just exchanging, more or less
3) Head over to Bed Bath and Beyond for new mattress pad. 

• 3a) Acquire two new pillows as well. Splurge on what is essentially a ShamWow to dry the dog (because you're tired of sacrificing real towels), and a cast-iron grill pan to replace warped nonstick grill pan you've had for years. 

4) Once again, feel inordinately pleased with yourself for, really, just spending a lot of money. 
5) Lug large bags of stuff home and immediately fill ginormous plastic BB&B bags with trash and recycling.

• 5a) Feel suddenly bad about consumerism. Soothe soul by washing dirty sheets for remaking bed with new mattress pad. Refuse to admit this is nonsensical.

6) Spend way too much time finding recipe to use friend's homemade Argentine chorizo. Settle on "shrimp and chorizo pizza with escarole and manchego" because you like all those ingredients, even though you have no pizza stone and no longer have time to make dough. 

• 6a) Buy all other ingredients at store, including dough. Assume you will magically figure out how to bake it.
• 6b) You're right.

My pizza totally 
looked exactly like 
this one. 
Except for how 
it didn't.

7) Consume dinner. Get stupidly full; actually save last piece of pizza for leftovers. Begin plotting when to make pizza again with other two chorizo links.

8) Throw in a disc of Star Trek: The Next Generation and finish your wine.

9) Put new mattress pad on bed. Remake bed. Consider climbing into bed. Decide to postpone until at least 9 p.m. for appearance's sake.

10) Seriously contemplate eating the leftover pizza. 

• 10a) Resist. 

11) More TNG. More wine. Feel inordinately pleased with (self-described) witty blog post.

FIN.

*"successful": "resulting or terminating in success"; incredibly boring to the entire rest of the world.